How was your day?

"How was your day?" asked my husband as we kind of ask each other every night.

Well this women called me today because she was like really super angry with me.  Which I get, because I had to tell her some stuff that wasn't really what she wanted hear the other day.  So she called me to yell at me, and whilst in the midst of yelling at me, she was all like "Can you hold, I have another call" and I went to answer NO but she just put me on hold, so I hung up.  Then I went to lunch and when I came back she had left me two messages asking why I would ended the call as our conversation clearly was NOT over and she told me she had another call.

An then I got home and the kids wanted to go in the hot tub and they were covered in ice cream because we went out for ice cream, and I didn't really want to bath them so I said yes.  So while they were in the hot tub,  I was eating their Easter chocolate and I heard them fighting.  So I went to see what they were fighting about.  Turns out they were fighting over bubbles in the hot tub, which is really just a clear indicator that it is super dirty and the water should be changed.  So I went back to eating their chocolate but they kept fighting so I made them get out which kind of sucked because I didn't really have anything else planned for the night, and I also had to put the rest of the chocolate back.

After that I bribed them to go to sleep and stop talking.  

So you know the usual.  

Then I asked him "how was your day"?

"Good", he said.

Feeding Frenzie

Someone must be able to relate.  I am continually hearing from my friends about their children being picky eaters.  How they will only eat certain foods and that they struggle to make sure they are getting enough everyday let alone a balanced diet.

Well in my  house we seem to suffer from the opposite problem.  My husband and I both love food and cooking.  I have a strong belief in eating whole food and trying new things; this typically means we don't eat much in the way of pre-prepared meals.  Our children are not picky eaters at all and usually are up for trying just about anything.  In fact my oldest convinced me to try tofu noodles the other day that I was unsure about and we all ended up enjoying them.   My youngest's favourite food is roasted brussel sprouts.  The other day after a much awaited trip by them to MacDonald's due to the toy appearing in the happy meals this month my oldest ordered a chicken caesar salad with water (which means I got a happy meal so we would have two toys!).

Now don't get me wrong I think it is fantastic that our girls are adventurous eaters.  They bring pumpkin ravioli and gumbo with chorizo in their lunches and its great.

The thing is, they love food.  The problem is, they love food.

From the time they began eating I have been surprised by the amount they can pack away.  I find myself saying daily "You don't have to eat all the food today!"  and "Don't worry we will have it again another time.".  When I tell my friends their normal replies are either " You're so lucky" or "I wish".

In  a way they may be right.  I can't imagine continually having to fight with them to get them to eat or try new things.  That would be awful; however, what we have is not the greatest.  I feel like I have to cut them off from thirds or fourths on a regular basis.  In my group of friends this does not appear to happen with them.

When they were little and we would head to play group after they had already eaten two breakfasts to start they day.  They person running the program would announce that it would soon be snack time and therefore you should clean up and wash your hands.  Some children were too busy playing to be bothered to stop and eat.  My two however always had their toys tidied, hands washed and were sitting nicely at the table ready to dig in in the blink of an eye.  I remember cutting them off after their third helping and feeling people's eyes burning into me as I tried to explain that they really had already eaten A LOT that day.  I felt as though I was reciting "The Very Hungry Caterpillar" trying to explain what they had already downed!  I'm sure there must have been much chatter about my poor unfed children.  Little did they know that  they were actually eating me out of house and home!

I have to believe that someone else must be able to relate!

Our 12 Days of Christmas

Another Christmas season has past in a blur.  Every year I feel as though our family along with everyone else is trying to pack there months of activities into December.  This year although not the most popular decision I decided that we were not going to do everything.  With that being said we still did way too much.  I thought I would take this time to share our families last twelve days prior to Christmas this year.

Counting backwards this begins on December 14th.
Jingle Day at my girls school.  As per the usual I totally forgot about the fact that everyday during the last week of school is designated with something special to wear until the last minute.  What every happened to just plain old and red & green day?  So what does when wear for Jingle Day?  Well dollar store bells tied in your hair of coarse.

December 15th
If memory serves me correct this was Christmas hat and sock day?  Also this was the night they had planned a Christmas play at the school.  All went relatively well except for our youngest being "that child" but that seems to happen often.

December 16th
Glitter day. That's right Glitter Day.  Enough said.

December 17th
Ugly Christmas sweater day and a turkey dinner.  Thankfully this means at least I didn't have to pack them lunches.  This also means a last minute shopping for an ugly sweater with no luck.  Apparently they were big sellers and were all sold out.  In the end they wore Christmas pyjama tops that someone else bought for them.

December 18th
Last day of school followed by a late night dress rehearsal.  Because the group they dance with must complete a dress rehearsal and it must be completed in the same order as the show (Silly suggestion to go youngest to oldest).  The dress rehearsals are guaranteed to be running late and typically we don't arrive home till nearly 10:00pm.  Of coarse by this time they are overtired and angry.  By the end of our 45minutes drive they were both in tears and toys had been taken away for upwards of the next three months.

December 19th
Christmas dance show.  Yes after the rehearsal is the show.  Back at the stage in full costume and make-up with a full 14hours between leaving the rehearsal.

December 20th
Way too wired children off of school nearly a full week before Christmas.  By this time they are already exhausted and don't even realize it and I am way too exhausted and do realize it.

December 21st
Start and finish Christmas Shopping praying the shelves aren't cleared.  Success!

December 22nd
Late night wrapping party for one including wine.

December 23rd
First puking child, but at least it's before Christmas.

December 24th
Unwrapping gifts to find one particular one and rewrap it in "Santa Paper".  All this because I found out that my mom purchased gifts that only Santa can make late night Christmas Eve.

December 25th
Second puking child

Upon reflection the only magical thing about Christmas is that we all make it through each year and actually look forward to it again the following year!

Babies are Thieves

Okay it has been awhile.  I mean like almost two years.  Turns out full time work and two young ones doesn't leave much time for anything else.  But school has started and they are both attending!  Jobs have changed and I am part time now and therefore back at writing about our lives from time to time.

I have been intending to write about this for awhile; however, like most things with me intentions and actions are two very different things.  I mean really, if things were based on intentions I should be accepting my Nobel peace prize any day now.  But I digress as this is another subject for another day.

Today is about mortality and immortality.  You know a pretty light subject to kick things off.  Prior to having children it was something that never crossed my mind.   But now....

Now I have learned what it means because I have lost mine.

A lesson I have only learned since having my children.  Before children I was invincible.  I never thought about what I could wrong, if someone could get hurt.  I may have even classified myself a bit of a risk-taker.  I remember distinctly thinking it odd when hearing others express concern about most things: flying, motorcycles, foreign travel. All of these things seemed like great adventures and experiences.  In fact if you were planning any type of adventure, I was your girl. White water rafting; I'm in.  Sky diving; for sure.  Traveling anywhere; definitely.

But now, how times have changed.  When looking  to  take a vacation prior to having children I would have typed something like “best places in the world to white water raft” into Google and based my holiday planning on the results I found.  Last year while booking a holiday my first search entered into Google was something along the lines of “safest destinations for children”.  I have gone from arriving home from a weekend away at 6:00am on Monday morning and forgoing any sleep to shower and just show up for work; to barely making it to double digits most nights and being concerned of how lack of sleep is affecting me.  I had a full on decision with my spouse about the need to have a least two more first aid kits in our procession the other night.  I have begun to carry weird items in my bag just to be prepared and I even got a flu shot this year, just in case.  

This cautious behaviour is still somewhat surprising to me and every now and then I recognize it creeping in.  Like when I was watching them sled down a small hill in our area.  I mean really small like run up and down it 10 times and not hardly be out of breathe small.  I caught myself thinking “maybe  I should purchase helmets for this activity”.  It still blows my mind that I am responsible for other human lives.  I mean, I barely function to take care of myself on some days.  

Some people has tried to convince me that this is really about accepting responsibility as I get older; however, I stand by my original thought that my children have simply stolen my mortality from me at birth.
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Save Your Sanity; Lower Your Standards

My husband often refers to me as hurricane as I whirl around trying to get things accomplished causing a path of mess in my route which then adds to the stress I am already creating.  My children are my two tornados, which is kind of self explanatory.  I, have hit hurricane status because of water involvement in my past messes.  So, as you can imagine a house of two tornados and a hurricane can sometimes lead to disaster.  

Each year my stress over the holidays begins to rise in November and peak just before Christmas.  I spend way too much time making lists and trying to do too many things in too short of time.  Honestly, it is a bit of a speciality for me though out the year but, is really apparent during the holiday season.  I always think I can accomplish 4 hours of realistic work into a 45 minute span, then am really disappointed when I don't get everything completed that I had hoped to.

Between my two maternity leaves; the amount of holidays I had upon my first return from maternity leave, and a job share that only ended about six months ago I have not had to work full time during the Christmas season since 2008.  I understand that for most people working full time during the holidays is the norm but it is not mine any longer and I did not adjust well.  In my head I believe I can do all the things that I did when I worked only half the amount of hours outside the home.  However, in reality I have to sleep each night so this is not really possible.

The following is a list of what I had wanted to complete in December 2013 with my family on top of the regularly scheduled activities we are involved in:

Completely finish and furnish dollhouse that was set to arrive on Dec 15th (by furnish I mean me making all the furniture)

Make sugar cookies and decorate them with kids

Do holiday baking for neighbours

Make gingerbread house of our house

Decorate inside and outside of house for Christmas

Go get Christmas tree from tree farm and decorate it

Take kids shopping for husbands gift and gifts for each other

Make an advent calendar

Make special Hors d'oeuvres for Christmas Eve

Go Skating weekly

Go to Santa Claus Parade

Go to See Santa Claus

Buy and wrap gifts for everyone on my list

Volunteer for Dance Recital

Host boxing day dinner

Assist husband grandmother with setting up for Christmas Dinner 

Go away for a night with husband

Attend special Christmas Craft days at the Library

Attend husbands work party

Attend and bring food to family Christmas 

Host a Family Christmas

Even when I look a the list I have crated it seems doable.  I know that most people probably have a similar one; but, I am here to say it is not doable.  At least not for me and my family.  This is how our list actually looked after December

Completed

Decorate inside and outside of house for Christmas

Go get Christmas tree from tree farm and decorate it

Buy and wrap gifts for everyone on my list

Volunteer for Dance Recital

Host boxing day dinner

Go away for a night with husband

Attend husbands work party

Attend and bring food to family Christmas

Host a family Christmas

Not Completed

Completely finish and furnish dollhouse that was set to arrive on Dec 15th (by furnish I mean me making all the furniture)- this got partially finished and I am still working on it

Make sugar cookies and decorate them with kids- nope, but they did decorate cookies at a party

Do holiday baking for neighbours- yes, but not as much as I had planned

Make gingerbread house of our house - this is when things started to get bad!

Take kids shopping for husbands gift and gifts for each other - nope, did this alone

Make an advent calendar - nope

Make special Hors d'oeuvres for Christmas Eve - nope, bought boxed ones

Go Skating weekly - nope

Go to 2 Santa Claus Parades -  nope, we made it to one

Go to See Santa Claus - nope, they did see him at a party

Assist husband grandmother with setting up for Christmas Dinner - not as much as I had planned

Attend special Christmas Craft days at the Library - yes, but late both times

Everything came to ahead over gingerbread.  I had made the gingerbread dough around the 12th of December and stuck it in the fridge to cut out and bake later.   This was already much later then I had intended but due to time restraints I was just trying to fit it in.  The dough sat in the fridge for over a week.  Finally one day I asked my husband who was going to be home with the kids for the day to bake the gingerbread houses.  I know what people are thinking here and yes not only  did I expect him to bake gingerbread houses but I expected him to create a fabulous gingerbread replica of our house that I could assemble and decorate with our kids when I got home.  And yes, I do know in hindsight that this is crazy, but at the time this was my expectation.  When I got home that night to find he did bake the gingerbread houses, but not as I would have hoped ( he baked 5 rectangles each  for each child to have a house with a flat roof) I was less than happy.  I stayed up late trying to carve more house looking shapes with a serrated knife out of the rectangles, then my husband and I moved out to the garage to work on painting, adding window, and shingling the dollhouse.

At about 11 that night he said to me "You have got to lower your standards" and as much as I hated to admit it he was absolutely right.  After that night lots of things got scratched from our list.  I bought boxed Hors d'oeuvres for Christmas Eve, although this may seem like a normal thing for me that was equivalent to me waving a huge white flag, screaming I give.

We then moved onto New Years which may be my favourite time of the year.  Christmas is over and I feel like it is a fresh start each year.  I know most people think resolutions are stupid and people never follow though.  Not surprisingly, I love them.  Last year I reined in my caffein addiction going from upwards of two pots of coffee a day to two in the morning and leeway for one more in the afternoon if really needed.  I went over my new limit a handful of times throughout the year; but, clearly a vast improvement from the couple of pots I was downing daily in 2012.  

So, Cheers to moving forward into 2014, this years goal is to ditch artificial sweeteners.  So far it sucks and I miss Mio -squirt, squirt, squirt.

Food for Thought

Lately I have noticed that my second child, the one I often refer to as "passionate" because it sounds a little less harsh then spastic is particularly "passionate" about her food.  I don't mean that she is being a picky eater, but seems to have strong opinions about how her food is presented to her. 

Sometimes she gets upset if she doesn't have the plate she anticipated getting, or the fork, or the cup, or she has a spoon and wanted a fork, or whatever.   Usually she resolves the frustration she is experiencing by throwing a fit and rolling on the floor while the rest of us carry on with our meal.  Heartless I am, and often hear myself quoting "Pinkalicous" saying "You get what you get".  Other times I give in and tell her to pick the items that she was hoping for, really just depends on the day. 

This has been one of her traits for some time now.  More recently she has begun to get very upset if the actual food on the plate is not presented as she would anticipate.  For example if she wanted a sandwich cut into squares and without thinking I cut it into triangles.  The biggest issue with this problem is that she already could be one of the most indecisive individuals ever.  She says she wants bread in triangles, then squares, then triangles.  So you go with triangles, hand her the plate and she melts because they are not squares.

Recently I took a picture of her while in the midst of one of her fits to show my husband as he had missed it.  She had gone bat sh*t  crazy because I had cut her spaghetti after she had asked me to.  She was unable to eat it long because she cannot twirl noodles on her own.  She would not allow someone to assist her in twirling noodles, thus she wanted it cut.  After it was cut she realized that it was no longer twirlable and lost it.

This instance was pretty funny due to her dramatic response and the epic fit that followed and therefore picture worthy.   Because I possessed the picture, it then became a topic of conversation between me and friends of mine who also have small children.  Friends indicated they attempted to pinch the bread on sandwiches back together to create the desired shape. Others shared trying to stack items into certain shapes or hide food underneath other food all in attempt to satisfy their child.  One girl explained to me that she spent about 10 minutes trying to mush a hamburger patty back together because she thought it would work because her child decided that she did not want it in pieces any longer.

At the very least sharing my photo and story with others has taught me that  I am not alone, and that we all attempt the impossible of putting food back together in some crazy manor.   Please feel free to share some of your own crazy reconstructing moments!

I Wish Someone Told Me

Recently while at a baby shower for a friend of mine I was asked to write down a piece of advice for the mom to be.  I wrote the following:

We all know nothing in the beginning.
We learn as we go.
Everything you think you know is probably wrong.
Best of luck!

This exercise got me thinking a little bit about the few things I did learn about labour & delivery, postpartum, and life after with a baby.  So in honour of my many pregger friends at this time here is a few things I do know, now.

Labour & Delivery
This is way messier then you can ever imagine

After you deliver your baby your body goes into shock as you have been through a major trauma including full out body shakes and shivers.  At this point the nurses will be your best buds piling warm blankets fresh out of the oven onto you and you will love them for it

Post Partum
Although some people's body's bounce back not everybody's does.  I was told that you will still look pregnant when you leave the hospital and I was prepared for that.  I was not prepared to always have an apron of excess skin hanging over my abominate area.  I was never super fit or thin but this was still shocking to me and very upsetting.  I was always the type of person thinking I would age naturally and would not choose plastic surgery; however, now I would be first in line for a mommy makeover.

Not everyone likes their baby instantly.  I loved them but I certainly did not like them until they were about 14 months old.  Life can feel a lot like groundhog day, doing the same tasks day in and day out.  Don't feel inadequate or like you are a bad person for not being over the moon about the baby stage if it isn't necessarily your thing.  I believe everyone has an age that they excel at dealing with.  Unfortunately I think I might currently be in mine which mean things may only go downhill from here.

Life After with your Baby
Your baby is not the same as anyone else's baby and so you need to learn the things that your baby likes and techniques that will work on your baby.

Nothing lasts; just when you think you get things figured out they change.  This is also true for the not so nice phases and none sleeping as well.

Hand warmers work fantastic to warm bottles on the go.

Adopt your new uniform: skinny pants with full tummy coverage; flat slip on shoes that easily go on and off without bending; short or long sleeved t-shirt with scoop neck for easy access if you are breast feeding; scarf to hide stains on said shirt, hide possible uncomfortable cleavage, and wipe  up baby puke; and lastly, a cardigan with pockets to throw pacifiers or whatever in.  The cardigan also works  wonderful to turn around and wear backwards if you are breastfeeding as a cover, when you do forget the expensive actual cover you bought.

So this is it; about all I do know and I hope it is helpful to all I know that will soon be expecting