Memories Worth Forgetting

There are not many instances when I have been legitimately embarrassed of my children.  Angry, frustrated, self conscience, yes; but embarrassed they belong to me has only happened twice. 

The first time was shortly after my second child was born.  My oldest was about 1 ½ at the time and I had made an appointment to have our dog groomed.  I packed both kids up and headed to town, which is approximately a 30 minute trip.  I dropped the dog off assuming we would have about a 30 minute wait; however, I was unpleasantly surprised to find out it would be around 3-4 hours.    This was too short to go home but too long to stay unprepared.  I attempted to stay in town and by the time we pick up the dog I had two very tired children.  One strapped to my chest in a carrier and the other walking beside me.  We entered the store to get the dog and by this time the youngest was unhappy and crying.  The youngest was whaling really, and my older child was becoming impatient.  When we were trying to leave the oldest decided she would like one of the dog toys and when I told her "no" she started having a full out tantrum; laying on the floor kicking and screaming. 

I stood in the middle of the store with a new baby crying on my chest, my toddler screaming and rolling on the floor and our 85lb dog jumping around on a leash.   I picked the oldest off the floor under my arm and carried her screaming to the car with the other one crying on my chest and the dog tugging at his leash the entire time. 

The second instance was much more recent.  I had decided that we were going to have a fun girl's day.  I thought I would take them skating and then head to the grocery store with the kid's carts.  It was to be my youngest child's first time ever skating.  I knew right from the beginning that it had the potential to be a bad experience, yet I remained optimistic and pursued on. 

We arrived at the area, laced up skates, put on helmets and winter items, and by the time we were going to step foot on the ice I was already exhausted.  I grabbed two plastic bar type things provided to assist little ones on the ice and headed out.  Instantly, the youngest was not interested in using the aide and only wanted to be held.  She started yelling and so I tried to head back to the door to exit.  This made her yell louder and when I mentioned to the older one we might have to get off the ice she began to whine as she was not ready to leave yet.  I hoisted the youngest onto my hip which was apparently against some kind of safety violation and was scolded by the 14 year old monitor.  I injured my back hunched over the youngest while trying to encourage the oldest; all the while trying to act excited and have fun.  Not long after I dragged them off the ice pretty upset.  They then whined  for a treat and I gave in defeated.  There is limited selection at the snack bar so they ended up splitting a chocolate bar.  Bad, bad, bad decision. 

I still had to head to the grocery store to pick up a few thing.  By the time we arrived I has two girls beginning to enter a downward sugar spiral.  They were beginning to become delirious;  but unfortunately our cupboards were bear and so we perserved on into the store.  I bent down to there level and threatened them within inches of life and informed them of how I expected they should behave.  I believe that they could see through my guise and knew they had me.   I mean they had already won the candy bar.  Next races insured through the store as well as a game of bumper carts, and run over mommy's feet all the while I am trying not to bust out my possessed my the devil growl and scream at them.  I did refrain and kept my cool somewhat; however, I am sure onlookers tisked me behind my back.  We made it to the till and my youngest ran over to the greeting cards starting to pull them out.  I ran over and told her "no" which provoked a screaming fit.  People began to stare at me and wonder if she was injured.  I picked her up onto my hip causing her to act out with violence and me trying to restrain her in a publicly appropriate way.  

At this moment my oldest thought it would be fun to run away from me.  Off she goes looking over her shoulder laughing all the way.  I paid for my items, ran after her and grabbed her by the arm. This action caused her to start screaming as well.  I dragged them to the car and secured them into their seats.  I closed the door and screamed at them in my evil voice.  I think I saw them both shutter and the car went silent.

We haven't been back to the store since.